Part I) The 12 Gifts of Christmas 2013:
On the 1st day of Christmas, the SNAP guy gave to me
A cup, and he told
me to pee.
On the 2nd day, I learned my per-meal subsidy:
One buck-thirty-three,
and a cup for my
sample of pee
The 3rd day of Christmas, the boss deigned to mention:
No more pension, one-buck-thirty-three, and a
cup for my sample of pee
On the 4th day, the border gave Mom big indigestion
Sent to detention, no more pension, one-buck-thirty-three,
and a cup for my sample of pee
On the 5th day, I wondered what the Dream Act means
More broken dreams, Mom in detention, no more
pension, one-buck-thirty-three, and a cup for my sample of pee.
On the 6th day, the food bank again ran out of greens,
I got more beans, more broken dreams, Mom in
detention, no more pension, one-buck-thirty-three, and a cup for my sample of
pee.
On the 7th day of Christmas, my boss proved he’s a slime,
Cut my hours to
part-time, more pounds
of dried beans, more broken dreams, Mom in detention, no more pension, one-buck-thirty-three,
and a cup for my sample of pee.
The 8th day, at work, I parked and didn’t see the sign,
95 buck fine, hours cut to part-time, more
pounds of dried beans, more broken dreams, Mom
in detention, no more
pension, one-buck-thirty-three, and a cup for my sample of pee
On the 9th day, the senator’s wish filled me with rage
No minimum wage?! 95 buck fine, hours cut to
part-time, more pounds of dried beans,
more broken dreams, Mom in
detention, no more pension, one-buck-thirty-three,
and a cup for my sample of pee
On Day 10, no more COLAs insists a DC sage,
Insecure old age! No minimum wage, 95 buck
fine, hours cut to part-time, more pounds of dried beans, more broken dreams,
Mom in detention, no more pension, one-buck-thirty-three, and a cup for my sample of pee
Day 11 wrecked my plans for state-paid rest and enjoyment*,
No help for unemployment, Insecure old age, 95 buck fine, hours cut to
part-time, more pounds of dried beans, more broken dreams, Mom in detention, no
more pension, one-buck-thirty-three and a cup for my sample of pee
On the 12th day, I got news much worse than unemployment:
My son’s deployment! No help for unemployment, no minimum wage, 95 buck
fine, hours cut to part-time, more pounds
of dried beans, more broken dreams, Mom in detention, no more pension, one-buck-thirty-three,
and a cup for my sample of pee.
*because living on unemployment…it doesn’t get much better than that!
To read Part II ("Where Can I Exchange These Gifts? Here's What I'd Rather Have..."), check back tomorrow.
